Me: Prodigal what are you doing on that?
Prodigal: Well I started on this path and thought I could quickly be done with this, but I find myself unable to get down and keep following these crazy cycles over and over again. I am getting tired. What should I do at this point?
Me: Stand completely still and I know a lot of us get on these crazy cycles and I will share with you maybe a way to finally stop.
Prodigal: Don’t worry I will not move at all while you are talking!
Gary and Lisa Heim talk about cycles in the book True North Choosing God in the Frustrations of Life.
The biggest obstacle to tasting and seeing that God is good is our foolish assumption that it is all up to us to make it happen. We so naturally try to live the Christian life in our own power that we don’t realize we are doing it. When we fail and go south, we just keep trying harder to do the right thing. We berate ourselves and work harder to stop grumbling and grasping. We think thoughts such as, I’m grumbling. Stop doing that! Or, I’m trying to get their approval again. Cut that out! I don’t need their approval. But we keep failing. We get discouraged and give up. Good grief. Who wants to live in this kind of cycle? While growth is most often a slow process, we’ll never know God by just trying harder. But relinquishing self-effort comes hard because by nature we’re proud and self-reliant. We hate feeling powerless and dependent.
The apostle Paul wrote, “Live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature”(Gal. 5:16). “Living by the Spirit” sounds so mysterious that we tend to gloss over Paul’s words. Or we assume that living by the Spirit means praying, having devotions, and trying to please God by doing what he tells us to do. We feel pretty good about ourselves when we manage to check those things off our Christian to-do list, and we feel a chronic, low-grade sense of guilt when we keep failing. Please tell me there’s more to the Christian life.
Yes, the Christian life does involve prayer, Bible study, and hard choices to stay faithful in tough times, but those things will not bear fruit. Christianity is not defined by choices but by affections. While true love for God is demonstrated by our obedience to what he tells us to do (Deut. 6-8; John 14:15), we make choices based on what we love and hold as supreme value. We will always choose what we value most.
This is what is hard for me to express. I see these Christians that God loves so much and they are stuck on a works cycle. They care more about the things, the approval, the position, how others see them. When in reality they are too focused on this list, these boxes they have to check off. . It will come natural to us to make choices of obedience when God really is the most valuable relationship and possession in our heart. God is not fooled by your impressive check list and luke warm heart. He would rather you complete one box and have a heart that is passionate about who He is.
Hebrews 10:21-22
And since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water.
Jennifer Van Allen
www.theprodigalpig.com
www.faithincounseling.org
